in a turn of events that shouldn’t surprise me, i’m about 90% sure i’m demisexual.
i’ve been looking at sexuality studies grad programs (of which there aren’t many, in case you were wondering), and one is basically a track to becoming a sexuality educator in schools, college campuses, and the government (local, state, and federal).
if i decide to go more toward education than research, this may be the program.
In some ways, the term “pansexual” came out of biphobia and a need to stipulate that one was not transphobic. If you take the binary view of “bisexual,” then a sexuality specific to an attraction to men and women could be seen as being noninclusive of transgender men and women. On the other hand, transgender men and women want to (and should) be seen as simply men and women, meaning that they would/should be included in that very binary; not including them tends to be much more phobic and noninclusive.
Then there is the thought that the binary view of bisexuality can be seen as phobic of anyone who identifies as genderqueer, or somewhere along the gender and sexuality spectrum, not identifying as male or female, man or woman. But, as I mentioned before, the true definition of “bisexual” is being attracted to those who are the same as me and those who are different from me, encompassing all genders and identities. The often-repeated argument that “bi means two” ignores a simple fact: “Same” and “different” are, indeed, two groups.
I want to hear the word “bisexual” come out of their mouth, not any “I just like people” or “everyone does it in college” bull. I want their bisexuality to be part of them, not some throw away line.
I want to see bisexual character that aren’t just some sexed up joke.
I want to see bisexual characters in same gender and mixed gender relationships.
I want to see bisexual people dating people of all genders, not just cis people (I also want to see more trans and genderqueer characters).
I want to see bisexual characters face biphobic crap head on, not just disappear when it comes up.
I want to see bisexual characters who remain bisexual, and some that change their labels because sexuality is fluid and that’s okay.
I want to see bisexual characters who are not conventionally attractive, cisgender, able bodied white women (and I want to see some that are).
I want bisexual characters who are faithful in relationships.
I want bisexual characters that cheat because that is in their character, and has nothing to do with their sexuality.
I want bisexual main characters, not just disposable sidekicks.
I want diverse, three dimensional bisexual characters who have character development.
Is that too much to ask?